Source| According to that sourcelink, 64-year old Ann Wurtzburger, pictured above, has decided to sue Kentucky Fried Chicken for TWENTY MILLION DOLLARS.
If you’re a normal person, you’re probably figuring that something truly heinous happened to Ann Wurtzburger at her local KFC. Like – maybe she slipped on a freshly mopped KFC floor and is paralyzed. Or maybe her grandkid choked on a chicken bone and died. Or maybe she found a live reptile in her chicken pot pie and it bit her in the eyeball. Something like that.
Normal people would make an assumption like that, because we’re normal.
But Ann Wurtzburger is a money-grubbing seahag, so the reason she’s suing KFC for $20 million is because the bucket of chicken she bought for $20 was only half full of chicken.
If you’re thinking, “Could she not have simply gone back to the KFC and asked them to fill the bucket up?” then congratulations. You’re a normal human being.
But Ann Wurtzburger isn’t. She said, about her ordeal:
“I came home and said, ‘Where’s the chicken?’ I thought I was going to have a couple of meals. They’re showing a bucket that’s overflowing with chicken. You get half a bucket! That’s false advertising, and it doesn’t feed the whole family. They’re small pieces!”
Ann Wurtzburger told the New York Post that KFC offered her $70 worth of gift certificates, but she sent them back, because she says this is about “the principle of the matter.” She went on:
“Sometimes you gotta hit people where they feel the hurt. For me, a corporation like that – would be in the pocketbook.”
Ann Wurtzburger is mad, you see, because when she sees chicken buckets from KFC advertised on television, they’re overflowing with chicken, but her bucket wasn’t like that. The incredibly patient people at KFC tried to explain to this lunatic that the reason the ads look like that is so that people can ACTUALLY SEE THE CHICKEN, and that a typical bucket contains 8 pieces of chicken, but she wasn’t having any of it.
According to the sourcelink, Ann Wurtzburger is a retired widow living on social security benefits, so obviously TWENTY MILLION DOLLARS would come in super handy. And it’s the PRINCIPLE, you guys. It’s the principle.
Meanwhile, KFC plans to ask the courts to dismiss this nonsense lawsuit as the frivolous pile of bullsh*t that it is.
I want to feel guilty for thinking a 64-year old grandma deserves a punch in the face, but I don’t.